The Invader Zim Cinco De Mayo Special
by Tangerine Patrol
Summary: Yes, Cinco De Mayo has already passed...but who cares! I can celebrate Cinco de Mayo any day! YEA Cinco De Mayo!


Yes, it's a bit late for Cinco De Mayo…just like the special kindergarten play in my skool. So doesn't matter. HA. Heh-heh…5th Of Mayonnaise…Mexican people sure know how to party.  
  
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:::The normal Invader Zim theme starts playing, only instead of the theme song, "Cinco De Mayo Is Holiday Time In Mexico" plays…and everybody has a paper flower in their hair:::  
  
:::Dib and Zim are walking down the street, approaching each other. They see each other, and stop.:::  
  
Dib: You know, Zim…I'm sick of this crap. Let's be friends!  
  
Zim: I second that emotion! Free love!!! Peace out, man! Release the peace! Conversation. Not confrontation!  
  
Dib: Wow Zim this isn't like you at all! You've changed! :::he stares down and makes circular motions in the sand with his foot::: You know Zim…I think I love you, so what am I so afraid of, I'm afraid that I can't handle, a love there is no cure for…  
  
Zim: It's so good you said that, because I love you too, Dib! I love you even more if you stop singing.  
  
Dib: Of course I'll stop singing! For you…anything!!! :::his face turns to that psycho obsessed stalker expression from "FEAR"::: Let me smell it…LET ME SMELL IT! YOUR HAIR! YOUR BEAUTIFUL DELICIOUS HAIR!!!  
  
Zim: Um yes sure…:::he leans over so Dib can smell his hair:::  
  
Dib: :::burying his face deep in Zim's hair, wig, whatever::: Oooh….:::does that Homer Simpson drool thing:::  
  
Billy: :::walking by::: Get a room!  
  
Dib: :::does that gay thing with his hand::: Aw, be nice!  
  
:::suddenly, "Everybody Dance Now" starts playing. And disco lights! Ms. Bitters is walking by.:::  
  
Ms. Bitters: Oh. VERY appropriate. :::her face twitches in that "*cltrk* A BOX OF ADHESIVE MEDICAL STRIPS! *cltrk*" manner::: Hey, sonny! Get me some prune juice or I'll shove this up yer ass! :::she takes a cane out of a hole in nowhere and shakes it at Dib:::  
  
Dib: :::shaking::: Yess m'am…:::he takes a can of prune juice out of nowhere and hands it to Ms. Bitters:::  
  
Ms. Bitters: Thanks sonny. :::crushes the can on her head::: :::floats up into the air::: HEY WHAT THE HELL?!!! :::she flies away. Dib and Zim watch her until she is a tiny dot in the sky. Then she disappears:::  
  
Zim: Oh great you killed her…NOW what will we do?  
  
Dib: Ooh, oh, I know! :::takes a giant notepad out of nowhere. There's some kind of bar graph on it.::: Zim…do your thing!  
  
Zim: Thank you, Dib. :::takes a pointer out of nowhere. He clears his throat and starts speaking in this really dumb congested voice, pointing to the giant notepad, which Dib is holding up::: Ahem…as you can clearly see, AT&T saves you money on long distance…compared to Sprint, $100.00 a second, and Verizon, two chickens or best offer. In conclusion, if you don't switch your long distance to AT&T this instance, we will hunt you down, set your house on fire, and remove all but one of your hearts. Got it? Good. Ahem.  
  
Dib: YAY! :::applauds and therefore lets go of the notepad::: Well, that was fun, but what will we do now?  
  
Zim: I know! Let's go to the Moby concert!  
  
:::YES! A musical sequence! Moby's "We Are All Made Of Stars" plays, as Zim and Dib happily frolic among the crowd. The crowd picks them up and starts passing them around. Dib then takes an egg out of his pocket and throws it at Moby. Zim gets the vibe and starts throwing eggs at Moby. Soon the whole crowd is following their example. Moby yells and runs off the stage. Eminem comes onto the stage!:::  
  
Eminem: :::rapping::: Moby, you can get stung by a bee! You're 36-year-old something-something! You don't know me, you're too old, let's go, it's over, NOBODY listens to techno!  
  
Crowd: BOO!  
  
Zim: Who's that?…  
  
Dib: I don't know! Let's egg him and then TP his house!  
  
Zim: Great idea!!! :::then his face turns to the camera, so it's the only thing we see::: Remember, kids, when TPing someone's house, ALWAYS take the wrapper off the toilet paper! ALWAYS! :::then his image freezes and a weird women's voice is speaking:::  
  
Women's voice: This Invader Zim safety tip brought to you by World Wrestling Federation and Federal Bureau of Investigation! Be safe and have fun!  
  
Dib: :::his expression is like this really retarded child from some baby educational show::: Wow! Now I will be sure to take the wrapper off! But what do we do now…  
  
Zim: I know! Let's go to your house and make Oreos! Sweet and black on both sides, with creamy white filling in the middle…  
  
Dib: And what the @#!$ is that supposed to mean?  
  
Zim: I don't know…  
  
:::Meanwhile at Dib's house. Poor profeser Membrane…is all alone.:::  
  
Prof. Membrane: Aw. I'm so lonely. No one loves me. I think I will die.  
  
:::suddenly, Ms. Bitters crashes through the ceiling. Yes she is alive. She distracts Prof. Membrane's attention from dying. And then we see the situation from his point of view…Ms. Bitters is surrounded by a halo of light like some kind of angel…and her long fluffy hair is flowing in the wind…oh wait there is no wind…well its flowing anyway:::  
  
Prof. Membrane: Wow…who are you beautiful lady?  
  
Ms. Bitters: I don't know…who are YOU? Not too shabby yerself.  
  
Prof. Membrane: Will you marry me?  
  
Ms. Bitters: :::shrugs::: Yeah sure. Why not. :::She takes his hand and they walk out of the house:::  
  
  
  
:::Then we see Zim and Dib walking to Dib's house…to make Oreos. Sweet and black on both sides and all. Dib sees his father walking hand in hand with Ms. Bitters…:::  
  
Prof. Membrane: :::notices Dib::: Oh hello son. I see you are getting along well with your new brother.  
  
Dib: Brother?  
  
Prof. Membrane: Yes son. Since I am getting married to Ms. Bitters here, I decided it would be appropriate to adopt Zim.  
  
Dib: MARRIED? ADOPT? ZIM?  
  
Zim: :::wanting to be part of the action::: GETTING? WOULD? SON?  
  
Prof. Membrane: What is this, children? You will RESPECT your new mother! Now give her a KISS!  
  
Ms. Bitters: AWWWW! Aren't you both so cute, children! :::she squeezes the poor "children" almost killing them::: I'm all like ^_^!  
  
Dib: Have you told Gaz yet?  
  
Prof. Membrane: Uh…no.  
  
Zim: Well, who needs her! Let's go home, family!  
  
:::Meanwhile on Irk…Tallest read and Tallest Purple are sitting on a bed(?) and looking at nothing:::  
  
Red: Are you happy, Purple?  
  
Purple; Yes, I'm happy, Red. Are YOU happy?  
  
Red: Yes, I'm happy, too, Purple.  
  
Purple: GREAT! We're BOTH happy! :::they hug…then the image freezes and the weird women's voice thing again:::  
  
Women's voice: This moment brought to you by Prozac! Got Prozac?  
  
THE END  
  
:::credits roll as some cheery Mexican music plays. Then when the credits are over…the whole cast of Invader Zim appears on the screen…including Mr. Vasquez:::  
  
Mr. Vasquez: :::stepping out of the crowd::: Hello boys and girls. I am the creator of the renowned TV show Invader Zim.  
  
A kid's voice from outside the TV: MOM!!! There's an UGLY guy on TV and he's SCARING me!  
  
Mom's voice: Don't worry honey. It's educational television. It's good for your brain.  
  
Mr. Vasquez: This educational episode goes to show you how UGLY and BAD prejudice and discrimination is. It is BAD. It makes you a BAD person. We are all brothers.  
  
A voice from the crowd: That's SO sexist…can't you say "siblings"?  
  
Mr. Vasquez: Siblings. So in conclusion…  
  
Crowd: HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!!!! :::confetti starts to fall:::  
  
Gaz: :::steps out of the crowd::: Happy Noches Des Las Muertos, suckers!  
  
Gir: Happy Buenos Monos!  
  
Prof. Membrane & Ms. Bitters: :::holding hands::: Happy Our Wedding!  
  
THE END 


End file.
